New Marriage in California. By Caroline Clark

I am surrounded by badass, feministy, queer women in my life. They inspire me, guide me, encourage me and show me that the world is changing to accomodate a vaster set of perspectives. I’d like to think the role of these ladies in my life is similar to the role of the women in Eleanor Roosevelt’s Brain Trust (a group of women the First Lady relied on to make key decisions in the White House). One of these women is Caroline Clark, whom I’ve known since I was 5 growing up in New York City. When the Supreme Court struck down a key component of the Defense of Marriage act last week, just days before national Pride weekend, she wrote a beautiful expository piece for Medium.com. It was Retweeted 200K times that day. (https://medium.com/better-humans/aa38ea7dfb5b) Excerpt below:

caroline clark

Pride by Caroline Clark

What a difference a year makes.

Last year I didn’t go to Pride.

Or the year before that, or the years before then.

It was because I was in the closet. And in the irrational fear that shrouded the darkness, I was convinced that going to Pride outed me in some way, or would raise questions in my friends’ heads. I watched the festivities with an outsider’s view.

But between that time and today, I met and fell in love with a woman. It was heart ripping out of my chest love. It was sleepless nights love. It was butterflies love.

I knew at the end I was very, very gay.

I thought about the lives of the people who fought for their country. I thought about being American, and being fortunate to have a great education.

I realized that nothing is done unless many do it, and many don’t do it until it begins with one.

I am not sure who it was — it may have been Edith Windsor or it may have been a nameless brave soul who said decades ago that we should have the right to marry.

I want my children and my grandchildren to live in a society where I am shown dignity, respect, and love. We are getting closer to it.

This week, I realized that it’s not the Supreme Court who has done it.

It’s us.